I was walking down George Street in Sydney when I got the message that Youtubers had stolen my daughter. I knew where they were gathering. I knew where she had gone to meet them. So I headed for Lunar Park.
It was a bit of a walk and then a wait for a Harbour Ferry from Circular Quay so it took almost an hour to get there. As I walked beneath the gaping mouth at the entrance I could see the gathering. It was a group of about 50 or 60 all joined together forming a circle - all holding cameras up and out and pointing back in towards themselves, naturally. All manor of social media had warned them all of my approach, so they were ready and waiting for me. They had all gathered in this giant circle with the guilty ones protected in the middle. I found out that it was Troye and Zoe.
I yelled their names as I approached the group and all the cameras turned in unison to face me. Since they were all concentrating on their cameras I could easily push to the centre of the group and I caught a glimpse of the guilty two who also continued to film. As I came face to face with Troye and Zoe the group suddenly parted and they both turned and tried to make a sudden, quick getaway on Segways. But they were not quick enough and I managed to grab the handle bar of Zoe's Segway. She wobbled and swayed and almost lost her balance and dropped her camera as she tried to regain control as she got away. I picked up her camera, which continued to record, held it up in front of me and pursued the Segway riding kidnappers. I chased them all around Lunar Park, filming as I went. You can probably find the footage on Youtube - footage from the camera I held and the hundreds of others who continued to film the events. It would be spectacular footage as well as they abandoned their Segways and I chased them into Koney Island - up steps, down slides, over moving sidewalks and through the rolling barrels. I lost them as they rushed out a side door and a group of onlooking Youtubers stopped me from following.
In exhaustion and frustration I collapsed to the floor. The kidnappers had escaped, their youtubing collaborators had halted my pursuit and stood before me motionless, filming my distress. Was everyone with a digital camera so evil, cruel and heartless? Then as everything fell silent I heard in the distance "Daddy...Daddy!!" It was coming from the Ferris Wheel. It was my daughter. I jumped up and pushed through the crowd and ran to the Ferris Wheel. My daughter was in one of the carriages screaming "Make them stop!" Troye and Zoe had jumped in another carriage after forcing the Ferris Wheel into overdrive. It was rotating faster and faster. I stood beside the Ferris Wheel - My daughter comes by screaming - the 2 Youtubers come by laughing maniacally. I had to end it all.
I turned to the crowd of Youtubers behind me who were all holding up their cameras filming the ever accelerating Ferris Wheel. I pushed them all back snatching as many of the cameras as I could. I ran to the Ferris Wheel and as my daughter's carriage almost reached the bottom I threw all the cameras into the gears turning the Ferris Wheel. In a flash of smoke and a shower of sparks the crushing cameras ground the gears to a halt - just as my daughter's carriage reached the bottom. I reached in and grabbed her out of the carriage and we both ran to get out of the fun park as quick as we could. As we ran beneath the smiling face at the entrance we turned to see the Ferris Wheel and all the cameras, that were working, were pointed towards the carriage at the top of the motionless Ferris Wheel where Troye and Zoe were screaming "Get us down......"
